Let’s talk about the breakups no one prepares us for: the friendship ones.

Not the dramatic, “she-slept-with-my-man” type of fallouts. I’m talking about the slow fades, the one-sided energy, the ghosting-without-a-word endings. The kinds that leave you scrolling through old text threads wondering, “How did we get here?”

And the truth is—most of us never get closure.
Not because we don’t want it.
But because somewhere along the way, we stopped believing it was worth the emotional labor.

So why do women walk away without closure?

1. We were raised on peacekeeping, not confrontation.

From girlhood, many of us were taught to be “nice,” to avoid conflict, to let things go. And that conditioning doesn’t just vanish because we’re grown. Having a direct, emotional conversation—especially with another woman—can feel like a risk, one we don’t always feel safe taking.

2. We’re tired.

Mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Life is lifing. Between work, love, healing, and everything in between, sometimes a friendship breakup feels like one more thing we just don’t have the capacity to unpack.

3. We assume she already knows.

We tell ourselves, “She knows what she did.” Or “It’s obvious why I pulled away.” But what if she doesn’t? Or worse—what if she does, and still chose not to reach out? That kind of realization can sting more than the silence itself.

4. We don’t want to seem too emotional.

Millennial women—especially Black women—have been told over and over again to be strong. To be unbothered. To “keep it pushing.” So admitting that we’re hurt? That we feel abandoned? That something as “simple” as a friendship ending broke our hearts? That kind of vulnerability is often seen as weakness.

But sis—it’s not weakness. It’s real.

5. Sometimes, silence feels safer.

Let’s be honest: not every friend deserves a front-row seat to your healing. Sometimes, silence is the closure. Sometimes you stop explaining and start protecting your peace. And that’s valid, too.

So where does that leave us?

It leaves us with feelings. With memories. With screenshots of conversations we don’t know whether to delete or keep. It leaves us trying to grieve someone who’s still alive—and maybe even still watching our stories.

And yet, here’s what I want you to know:

Closure doesn’t always come in a conversation.
Sometimes it comes in a boundary.
A journal entry.
A deep exhale.

You don’t owe anyone your pain just because you shared your past.
You get to choose healing—even when it’s quiet.
Even when there’s no “we need to talk.”

It’s about protecting your softness, even when the world—and the people you love—don’t handle it with care.

Have you ever walked away from a friendship without closure? Did it bring you peace or leave you with more questions? Let’s talk about it in the comments.