Have you ever looked at your social media followers list and thought, “Why am I still letting this person watch my life?”That was me not too long ago. I realized I was giving access to people who no longer had a place in my life, people who weren’t clapping for me, weren’t supporting me, and honestly didn’t deserve front-row seats to my journey. So, I made the decision to change that.

For years, I subscribed to the idea that we should keep our haters and doubters on our social media feeds. The mindset was simple: “Let them see the glow up.” The thought of someone secretly watching my success was supposed to feel empowering. But recently, I had a shift. I no longer agree with that saying.

Some people do not deserve access to me, period.

This realization didn’t come overnight. It came after months of feeling unsettled about who I was still allowing to occupy space in my digital world. I would scroll through my followers list and see faces of people I no longer talk to, people who once called themselves my friends, people who distanced themselves when I needed them most, and people who quietly pulled away from my journey yet still wanted to peek into my life. And I had to ask myself: Why?

Social Media Is Access

Let’s be real, social media is not just posting pictures and statuses. It’s access. When I post, I’m sharing my world, my progress, my work, my thoughts, and my milestones. It’s a form of connection. So why would I continue giving that access to people who no longer serve me, people who don’t clap for me, and people who only show up as spectators instead of supporters?

When you start to see your digital space as an extension of your home, it changes things. If someone isn’t welcome in my home, why would I let them peek through the windows every day?

The Decision to Clean House

I made the big decision to clean my social media. And it wasn’t just a surface-level “unfollow a few people and keep it moving.” This was intentional. I went down my list and deleted individuals who I was once close to but no longer have genuine connection with.

At first, it felt a little strange. There’s this unspoken rule that if you delete someone, you’re being “petty” or “dramatic.” But let’s break that down: what’s actually dramatic is pretending to keep up with someone online when in reality, the relationship is over.

If we can’t be woman enough, or adult enough to have a mature conversation about why our friendship isn’t what it used to be, then what’s the point? Why keep tabs on each other’s lives through curated posts and filtered snapshots? That’s not friendship. That’s voyeurism.

Halfway Support Isn’t Support

Another big piece of this decision came from noticing who was there for me in business versus who was there for me in life. I’ve had friends who removed themselves from certain aspects of my work, which, ideally, is where I need their support the most. They’ll clap for me in private, but go silent when it comes to public acknowledgment.

That’s not the type of energy I want around me. Support isn’t conditional. Support isn’t halfway. Either you’re with me, or you’re not. And if you choose not to be, that’s fine but, then you also don’t get a front-row seat to watch me build, grow, and thrive.

Closure on My Terms

So often, we wait for closure. We wait for the conversation, the apology, the explanation, the moment that will make everything “make sense.” But closure doesn’t always come the way we expect. Sometimes closure looks like you making the decision for yourself.

Deleting those people wasn’t about revenge or bitterness, it was about peace. I don’t need to carry the weight of old connections that no longer serve me. I don’t need to keep pretending that digital ties equal real ties. If someone removes themselves from my journey, I don’t need to keep offering them access just to prove a point.

Why Wait?

We love to make these bold declarations at the end of the year: “New year, new me.” We convince ourselves that January 1st is the magical reset button. But the truth is, you don’t need to wait for a date on the calendar to reclaim your peace.

Why not do it now?

I asked myself that very question, and the answer was clear: there was no reason to wait. Every day I keep someone in my space who doesn’t belong there, I’m delaying my own healing and growth. So I did it now. And the freedom I feel is unmatched.

Protecting Peace Is Priority

I share this because I know I’m not the only one holding on to digital ghosts. Many of us keep people around out of habit, fear of judgment, or the pressure to appear unbothered. But the truth is, protecting your peace is more important than performing strength for an audience.

Removing access doesn’t make you weak, it makes you wise. It means you understand that not everyone deserves front-row seats to your life. It means you value yourself enough to protect your energy, your vision, and your joy.

So if you’ve been debating whether to delete, unfollow, or block someone, let this be your sign. You don’t need to explain. You don’t need to feel guilty. You don’t need to wait until the new year. Do it now.

Because peace is worth more than performance.

And access to you? That’s a privilege, not a right.