Identifying your love language can be the best way to maintain a strong relationship over time. There have been five ways people tend to communicate and receive love. I’m hoping by now you know the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, receiving gifts and acts of service.

Surprisingly, so many people expressed that their way of receiving and expressing love was not one of the five. I think our society may have just evolved past the standard five love languages with the mindset of relationship expectations continue to change and we had to adjust.

With the help of three relationship experts we now have shared experiences and emotional security which are rooted in connections.

Shared Emotions

While this is very similar to quality time, this one is probably the love language I can relate to the most. People who have this love language enjoy creating special memories with the person they’re in a relationship with. They actively seek out adventures and memorable experiences that they want to share with their partner, and doing so makes them feel loved and most importantly love their partner. It can be the simplest thing like a walk in a park or a road trip.

It’s not about the shared time, its more so about what you do during the time shared. What you do with that time together is important. The act of planning out fun and meaningful experiences, as well as carrying them out together, ultimately allows a person to feel loved.

Emotional Security

If we’re being honest, most of us have been traumatized in some kind of way. For those of us who are survivors of trauma, emotional security is a great foundation. While grieving and going through healing, trauma survivors can find safety in the moment and safety within their relationship.

I’ve seen couples that already have a secure attachment style and emotional security as a love language resonates with them deeply. Most people feel loved when they are seen, heard, and understood in deep and close connection with others.

Emotional security looks like deep conversations. Many of you crave deep conversations because thats what you give and you have so much to unload. There has to be mutual vulnerability.

I encourage you to be careful with this one. Before depending on that emotional support from someone else, learn to depend on yourself first.

Does the two new love languages fit your style of love? Are you apart of the first five group?